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Liberalwife
47 / female
north, England, UK
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Attempts at Sex.....Part 2
To My Dearest Husband,
I think things are a little confused. Here are the REAL reasons you didn't get more than you did this past year:
Came home drunk and tried to screw the cat - 23 times
Did not come home at all - 36 times
Did not come - 21 times
Came too soon - 38 times
Went soft before you got it in - 19 times
Cramps in your leg - 16 times
Working too late - 33 times
You had a rash, probably from a toilet seat - 29 times
Caught yourself in your zipper - 15 times
You had a cold and your nose kept running - 21 times
You had burned your tongue on hot coffee - 9 times
You had a splinter in your finger - 11 times
You lost the notion after thinking about it - 42 times
Came in your pyjamas after reading a dirty book - 16 times
The reason I laid still was because you had missed me and were screwing the sheet. You seemed to be having a good time and I didn't want to move and spoil it for you. I wasn't talking about the crack in the ceiling. What I said was, "Would you like me on my back or kneeling?" The time I was thrashing around and gasping was when you farted and I was fighting for air. Maybe you can work on your "shortcomings?"
Love,
Your Wife.
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| July 3, 2007, 05:26 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: Attempts at Sex.....Part 2
both of them are so funny
take care
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| July 3, 2007, 07:06 |
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REALshedevil
66 / female
Richmond, Missouri, US
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Re: Attempts at Sex.....Part 2
Oh Liberal!    
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| July 3, 2007, 08:05 |
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