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Liberalwife
47 / female
north, England, UK
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Attempts at Sex.....Part 1
To My Dearest Wife,
During the past year, I have attempted to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a list of why I didn't succeed more often:
We will wake the kids - 54 times
It's too late - 15 times
I'm too tired - 42 times
It's too early - 12 times
It's too hot - 18 times
Pretending to be asleep - 31 times
The neighbours will hear - 9 times
Headache or backache - 26 times
Sunburn - 10 times
Your mother will hear us - 9 times
Not in the mood - 21 times
Watching the late show - 17 times
Too sore - 26 times
New hairdo - 6 times
Wrong time of the month - 14 times
You had to go to the bathroom - 19 times
Of the 36 times that I DID succeed, the result was not always satisfying because 6 times you just laid there, 8 times you reminded me that there was a crack in the ceiling, 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with, 7 times I had to wake you up to tell you I was finished, and once I was afraid that I had hurt you because you started thrashing around and breathing heavy. Let's try to improve this, shall we??
Love,
Your Hubby.
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| July 3, 2007, 05:25 |
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REALshedevil
66 / female
Richmond, Missouri, US
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Re: Attempts at Sex.....Part 1
Good one Liberal  
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| July 3, 2007, 08:06 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: Attempts at Sex.....Part 1
sound like my wife
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| July 14, 2007, 10:18 |
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