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User no longer registered.
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When no one replies
Just wondering, how you feel when you send messages to members and you don't get any replies, whether it is friends you have made or ones you'd like to get to know. 
Do you start to question how you come across to others, do you feel hurt or just brush it off and don't let it worry you. 
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| June 3, 2007, 07:57 |
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dave2big
81 / male
somewhere, Nebraska, US
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Re: When no one replies
well pretty, speaking only for myself, my feelings are hurt. when i message a woman that interests me and i get NO reply, either "yes, i am interested, or no thanks, you are not for me, it bothers me. as a small mid-western boy ,here in the US, i was taught that having manners was the easiest thing a person could possess. too bad that the whole world didnt have a mother like mine.....poor but well-mannered !!!!!
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| June 3, 2007, 08:04 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
Excellent topic Pretty, it made me think. So, if i have ever ignored anyone, or not replied to your message it wasn't intentional, and if i have hurt anyones feeling, please forgive me. 
I will say, sometimes if i get a really crude unfeeling message, i do ignore it, maybe not the right thing to do,  so i will now reply regardless, even if it is to say no thank you. 
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| June 3, 2007, 08:28 |
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Re: When no one replies
I deal with the general public at work and have for many years. Although I am disappointed when someone does not reply, I understand the ill mannered methods some people employ these days. Then, I simply brush it off and move on. Would prefer dealing with and spending time with people who do have some basic respect and manners, anyway. Fortunately, there are enough of them around.
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| June 3, 2007, 08:49 |
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slowpoke2
52 / male
aberdeen, Scotland, UK
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Re: Re: When no one replies
QUOTE (dave2big @ June 3, 2007, 08:04)well pretty, speaking only for myself, my feelings are hurt. when i message a woman that interests me and i get NO reply, either "yes, i am interested, or no thanks, you are not for me, it bothers me. as a small mid-western boy ,here in the US, i was taught that having manners was the easiest thing a person could possess. too bad that the whole world didn't have a mother like mine.....poor but well-mannered !!!!!
i am like dave2big, i try and be cute, sexy, charming, etc when i reply but still i get no answer, i was hurt for a start but now i just say their loss or i don't even bother writing a message to them.
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| June 3, 2007, 08:52 |
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Re: When no one replies
It is always good to chat, whether it is on here or at home or work. It makes my day when i hear from friends and to have a laugh with them. I've always been very sociable, and i do feel hurt when i don't get a reply. 
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| June 3, 2007, 08:58 |
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Re: When no one replies
It all depends on so many things....female members on adults sites are so outnumbered by males, throw in the number of females looking for other females, and couples looking a female for a 3-some.....and any single female on any site mostly finds herself a bit overwhelmed with messages and notes.
Maybe it's who you are messaging, are they online often? Have they logged in lately to even reply?
There are some that just like to get and read messages, but they don't ever reply to anyone...so in those cases, it's them, not you.
When people ask this question...it would really be helpful if they also just gave us a sampler of what kind of messages they are sending out...then we could just honestly tell you if it's the kind of message we would respond to or just delete....and like we've all talked about before on the forums...some messages are just really hard to reply to, some are just so easy to.
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| June 3, 2007, 09:54 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
By the way.....I have my share of this....I see people who have been members here as long as I have, I see them online all the time, I'll send them just a friendly casual "hello" and get no reply from them ever!
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| June 3, 2007, 09:56 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
I have only had it happen a few times, and the question was just me being curious about how others feel when it happens to them. As a free member i have only been able to send notes.
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| June 3, 2007, 10:02 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
I try to reply to all messages even if it is to say no thanks to some one I have no interest in getting to know
I was raised with respect and my grandmother taught me to answer every note or letter no matter if the answer was yes or no
take care 
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| June 3, 2007, 10:07 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
I say at first I was hurt but after awhile I don't expect everyone to reply because sometime I just saying hi I like your profile or photo and there could be a big age difference so reply all the time is not necessary
I always reply if I'm interested or not but like chazzy said there so many more men on here than women 
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| June 3, 2007, 16:17 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
Hi prettyplze,,,I think that happens to all of us once in a while, I know it does to me, and when it does I just figure that I am out of my league, and I think it is mostly the age difference thing for me. But I also think that alot of people, mostly women, come here just to see "How they Rate", you know, see if they "Still Got It". They probably get aroused and love getting all the mail, but in reality they are shy and do not know what to say or how to answer someone back, that they never intended to meet in the first place. Or maybe they are waiting for the Prince on the white horse to come along and do not want to hurt any ones feelings who does not fit there expectations, so they just do not answer.
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| June 3, 2007, 20:29 |
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AmberZed
56 / female
South of that..., Georgia, US
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Re: When no one replies
I guess I'd have to take the opposite position in this debate. I always try to reply to friends, and when I send one of them a message and don't get a reply, I wonder what's wrong. But on the other hand, if it's someone I don't know, I don't necessarily feel obligated to reply to every unsolicited message I get. Is that rude?
As a free member, the message/response options I have are kind of limited (not that I'm complaining!). I really prefer to get to know people in chat. I hate to tell anyone "no-thanks" -- I've learned more than once that the person with the obnoxious profile can turn out to be a lot of fun... and vice versa! So if I get a message from someone with an interesting profile, I send them a "come chat with me sometime" reply... otherwise, I'd rather send no reply than "i'm not interested".
But I'm glad you brought up the issue -- maybe I'm being insensitive? I never thought of it that way, but I will now.
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| June 3, 2007, 22:01 |
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funlovingpair
59 / couple
Frozen Tundra, Minnesota, US
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Re: When no one replies
I have to say that it happens a lot more than you would think. That's kinda why I would support the idea of removing the profiles of those who rarely sign in. I know that for us, we have messaged quite a few who have yet to return the message, not even a drop dead. Now from the other side of the message, we have a few that have sent messages to us, and we not replied only because the message rude, crude and disrespectful. If they send a message that at least shows some signs of being nice, I will reply, it may not be what they want to hear. We've had some real winners, but thankfully only a couple that we had to block. So far all these nut balls have messaged for Ma, and I will reply, just to make sure that they get the clear message, not to bother us like that again. I'm not very good about replying right that second, but I will get to it as soon as I can. There are some hear that get a message from me everyday, and they will reply back everyday. For that I wish to thank them for their friendship .
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| June 3, 2007, 22:05 |
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40something
57 / female
In the Sun, Arizona, US
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Re: When no one replies
Thank you for such a thought provoking thread. I was not sure what the proper way to go about answering some messages. I will probably still not respond to the outright crude, foul emails, but your ideas definately make a difference to my behavior.
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| June 3, 2007, 23:34 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
great thread!
i ALWAYS respond to emails sent its the polite thing to do
but a good point is how people sometime send such crude impolite letters. people hate that! and i dont blame them for ignoring those
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| June 4, 2007, 01:07 |
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Liberalwife
47 / female
north, England, UK
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Re: Re: When no one replies
QUOTE (fingerboy1 @ June 4, 2007, 01:07)great thread!
i ALWAYS respond to emails sent its the polite thing to do
but a good point is how people sometime send such crude impolite letters. people hate that! and i dont blame them for ignoring those
When i get mails of that nature, from a 'stranger'....I don't apologise for not responding.  
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| June 4, 2007, 05:02 |
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slowpoke2
52 / male
aberdeen, Scotland, UK
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Re: Re: Re: When no one replies
QUOTE (Liberalwife @ June 4, 2007, 05:02) QUOTE (fingerboy1 @ June 4, 2007, 01:07)great thread!
i ALWAYS respond to emails sent its the polite thing to do
but a good point is how people sometime send such crude impolite letters. people hate that! and i don't blame them for ignoring those
When i get mails of that nature, from a 'stranger'....I don't apologise for not responding.
i can understand that but what if you send a nice, charming, romantic, sweet message and you still get no response, all it takes is thanks but no thanks, i have received a number of mail from men wanting to do things to me i just say thanks but not that sort of guy & i usually get a reply saying thanks for responding,etc that is all it takes, 2 Min's of your time
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| June 4, 2007, 05:49 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
Thank you all for your thoughts and responses and to bubblegum and hothands for your kind messages. Hope you all get replies to your future messages,  and have lots of fun
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| June 4, 2007, 07:57 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
 
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| June 4, 2007, 08:22 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
Your very welcom prettyplze
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| June 4, 2007, 09:02 |
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rawk35
56 / couple
valley, Oregon, US
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Re: When no one replies
95% of who I write dont reply.perhaps its me and how I come across or nobody is interested.either way, Im still smilin and enjoy this site! power to ya WN.
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| June 4, 2007, 15:33 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
it all depends upon what the original message context is....
i usually try to respond even if it's just a simple "no-thanks"...and i agree with amber...it's more fun getting to know someone in the chat room first! then you won't be a "stranger" any more, and i am more likely to respond.
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| June 5, 2007, 03:08 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: When no one replies
Well, I use to be on here often, but work has changed the rules and now I'm in an office.
I try to visit when I can because I've enjoyed the chats so much.
Send me a note. I promise to reply the next time I'm on.
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| June 10, 2007, 17:20 |
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