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Whats cheating???
Differene people percieve cheating differently. What your take on it.
Some guys say if their girlfriend kisses another guy its cheating but if she kisses another girl then its ok. Even if its behind their back!
Some people say its fine to kiss but not ok to go further than that.
Is thinking about someone else whilst ur with someone else cheating?? Isnt that worse than kissing someone else?
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| May 10, 2007, 08:37 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
I kinda take the Bill Clinton approach, if you dont inhale swallow and you use a condome, it doesnt count, especially if your in the moment and with someone you really like alot or are close personal friends with. Not someone you just met in a bar. I think it is good to have personal relations with someone besides the one your married to,,I believe it will make a good marriage stronger, or make you realize you are married to the wrong person.
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| May 10, 2007, 09:05 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (hothands @ May 10, 2007, 09:05)I kinda take the Bill Clinton approach, if you dont inhale swallow and you use a condome, it doesnt count, especially if your in the moment and with someone you really like alot or are close personal friends with. Not someone you just met in a bar. I think it is good to have personal relations with someone besides the one your married to,,I believe it will make a good marriage stronger, or make you realize you are married to the wrong person.
Geeeeesh.....hh...what you been smokin...
  
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| May 10, 2007, 12:23 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
Why,,,,? You Want Some,,,?
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| May 10, 2007, 17:09 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
I define cheating as anything sexual or romantic done secretly behind your partner's back.
Some have open relationships with full sexual contact or only involve online internet relationships, but for them it isn't really cheating if both halves of the couple are aware of it, and have together decided their own guidelines and rules to follow.
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| May 10, 2007, 18:09 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
I'm kinda thinking if we don't know what cheating is by now, we missed the boat somewhere along the line, or we are hoping that we can find an excuse for our over sexed appetites, non-the less I came here for fun, to meet new people , and sex if it should so happened to work out that way. If I need answers for my sexual behavior in connection with offending my partner, then I guess I would probably go to marriage counseling, see a shrink, or just keep my thoughts about it shut, my mind open and have some fun, I suppose I feel that way because I am not getting any younger and want to have some fun while I still can.
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| May 10, 2007, 19:31 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (hothands @ May 10, 2007, 17:09)Why,,,,? You Want Some,,,?
Why sure...figured we swap ...eastern for mt grown...it's the richest kind
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| May 10, 2007, 19:42 |
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Re: Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (Leviathan4u @ May 10, 2007, 19:42) QUOTE (hothands @ May 10, 2007, 17:09)Why,,,,? You Want Some,,,?
Why sure...figured we swap ...eastern for mt grown...it's the richest kind
That is only because Juan Valdez the crop farmer for Foldgers is probably watering the tobacco with the same method he uses on the coffee beans,,,a little wizz here, a little wizz there,,,,,
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| May 10, 2007, 19:57 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
To me, there can be more than a physical relationship type of cheating. I think that if your feelings and emotions are with someone else, that is as bad as the physical type of cheating........
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| May 11, 2007, 03:56 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (troybuilt @ May 11, 2007, 03:56)To me, there can be more than a physical relationship type of cheating. I think that if your feelings and emotions are with someone else, that is as bad as the physical type of cheating........
try not to look at it in the wrong light, because there are reasons that your emotions may be with some one else, it just does not happen, it is because our spouse in general are not giving us what we need in a relationship so we tend to look other places especially after we have exhausted all the ways we can think to repair our relationship without loosing our ass's in a court room of greedy attourneys.
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| May 11, 2007, 08:40 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
deciet is the key. ANYTHING she feels she needs to "hide" from me is cheating. not saying I need to know everything either. meaning something as simple as sending a flirty email could be cheating to a degree... now if she says 'hey that guy is hot as hell.. i'd like to suck his cock'... i might just say go for it and no problems.
it always boils down to the trust issue. if she dont have enough trust in her own self control so that she sees something as a possible threat to me and needs to keep it a secret, then how can i have that trust in her?
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| May 11, 2007, 11:05 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (boredcountryboy @ May 11, 2007, 11:05)deciet is the key. ANYTHING she feels she needs to "hide" from me is cheating. not saying I need to know everything either. meaning something as simple as sending a flirty email could be cheating to a degree... now if she says 'hey that guy is hot as hell.. i'd like to suck his cock'... i might just say go for it and no problems.
it always boils down to the trust issue. if she dont have enough trust in her own self control so that she sees something as a possible threat to me and needs to keep it a secret, then how can i have that trust in her?
that's a helluva jump BCB: from "a flirty email to i'd like to suck his cock"..but i do agree with ya,,,in part..that trust is so much a part of it...but is the deceit stemming from the lack of trust?...or only partial trust?...something like.."yeah, I trust you..except not around so and so..(some hot babe )...
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| May 11, 2007, 11:11 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
not sure i can explain it clearly. but the way i see it, if a person does action X and their own conscience tells them it is wrong and will probably hurt the one they love and they decide to cover it up by not saying anything or outright lieing about it... it shows they cant even put 100% trust in themselves in that particular, or any similiar, situation. i can't put more trust in someone than they put in themselves.
if an action takes away that trust its cheating.
and the email/cock sucking thing was just an attempt to say its not so much the action as the circumstances that qualify something as cheating.
all just my personal opinion
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| May 11, 2007, 12:35 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
hmmmmm...good thoughts...for sure...so it comes down to trusting oneself then....god, men are at such a disadvantage...its a curse to have "2 heads"....both with an independent conscience...trying to tame that "other head" for decades!!
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| May 11, 2007, 15:25 |
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ssaymssik
45 / male
Washington, Pennsylvania, US
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Re: Whats cheating???
Hers the bottom line, its cheating if your partner has no idea that you have done something to betray their trust. If they are present and its mutual than its not cheating, but if u have remorseful feelings about doing something with another person that u know you're partner has no idea about, than u have cheated.
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| May 12, 2007, 03:33 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
Very good question...very good replies!
First off, no one is judging anyone here, no need to take anything personal.
We all know that there are tons of people "stuck" in unworkable marriages and there are reasons why these people can't or won't divorce and seek affection outside the marriage. The need for human warmth is a very strong need.
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| May 12, 2007, 10:30 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
I am not sure if it is a good question here or not, for me Morality on a sex website is like trying to introduce Healthy eating into Paula Deans kitchen,,, 
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| May 12, 2007, 23:38 |
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Tungmeister
69 / male
Miller Beach, Indiana, US
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (hothands @ May 12, 2007, 23:38)I am not sure if it is a good question here or not, for me Morality on a sex website is like trying to introduce Healthy eating into Paula Deans kitchen,,,
 Yes but she takes "One a Day for Women", Fibresol, and has a 3 quart, high colonic every morning on the set while the crew is setting up!
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| May 12, 2007, 23:45 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
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| May 12, 2007, 23:48 |
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HenryG
65 / male
Central Georgia, Georgia, US
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Re: Whats cheating???
I was with my x for over 20 years. Never cheated on her. I would not do that. That is just the way I feel. I do not cheat or lie. Bad business, in my opinion. My morals will not let me do so.
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| May 12, 2007, 23:53 |
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Tungmeister
69 / male
Miller Beach, Indiana, US
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Re: Whats cheating???
OK, sorry Chazzy. I'll answer this thread as well as possible and say what I think "cheating" is. There are numerous levels of cheating. Many people rationalize by saying "porn isn't cheating", " mutual masturbation with someone other than your partner isn't cheating", "getting "head" from someone isn't cheating", --"only intercourse is ACTually cheating". No matter how much we love the person we are with, we all cheat in our hearts to some degree no matter how faint, some a lot more than others. I think what matters in the long run is whether or not we act on it. God made us animals with a soul. SUCH a curse! Besides saddling us with that, he gave us superior intelligence over the rest of the animal kingdom who's only responsibility is to find food & procreate and the bonus (or incentive) is that it feels REALLY good at the same time. With this higher intelligence, we have immensely creative imaginations that enable us to "improvise" whether it be masturbation while creating a fantasy, toys, various fetishes, oral this and that, etc. But he also gave us a conscience. We all have to deal with that. We all know if we are cheating on our "significant other", either in our hearts or worse. (anybody that wouldn't know & feel this emotion is a certifiable liar or sociopath!)
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| May 13, 2007, 00:07 |
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Tungmeister
69 / male
Miller Beach, Indiana, US
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Re: Whats cheating???
PS> I'm waiting for someone to correct my spelling of "sociopath".
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| May 13, 2007, 00:16 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (Tungmeister @ May 13, 2007, 00:07)OK, sorry Chazzy. I'll answer this thread as well as possible and say what I think "cheating" is. There are numerous levels of cheating. Many people rationalize by saying "porn isn't cheating", " mutual masturbation with someone other than your partner isn't cheating", "getting "head" from someone isn't cheating", --"only intercourse is ACTually cheating". No matter how much we love the person we are with, we all cheat in our hearts to some degree no matter how faint, some a lot more than others. I think what matters in the long run is whether or not we act on it. God made us animals with a soul. SUCH a curse! Besides saddling us with that, he gave us superior intelligence over the rest of the animal kingdom who's only responsibility is to find food & procreate and the bonus (or incentive) is that it feels REALLY good at the same time. With this higher intelligence, we have immensely creative imaginations that enable us to "improvise" whether it be masturbation while creating a fantasy, toys, various fetishes, oral this and that, etc. But he also gave us a conscience. We all have to deal with that. We all know if we are cheating on our "significant other", either in our hearts or worse. (anybody that wouldn't know & feel this emotion is a certifiable liar or sociopath!)
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| May 13, 2007, 00:33 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
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| May 13, 2007, 00:34 |
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Tungmeister
69 / male
Miller Beach, Indiana, US
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
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| May 13, 2007, 00:43 |
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Re: Whats cheating???
www.merriam-webster.com
try iy you'll like it,,,,you can download a tool bar that you can use while you are on the computor,,,I think that is the correct website,,,to be sure ask  Chazzy
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| May 13, 2007, 08:29 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (hothands @ May 12, 2007, 23:38)I am not sure if it is a good question here or not, for me Morality on a sex website is like trying to introduce Healthy eating into Paula Deans kitchen,,,
I've seen this question and similiar ones on every adult website out there, "What is Cheating?" ..."When is it alright to cheat?"....."What would you do if you knew your best friend was being cheated on?"......They are all adult topics, no one is judging anyone here,
The question merely asks what your personal defintion of cheating is....
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| May 13, 2007, 09:52 |
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Liberalwife
47 / female
north, England, UK
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Re: Whats cheating???
Cheating is when the harmed person says it is, not when you think it is...!
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| May 14, 2007, 04:11 |
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Re: Re: Whats cheating???
QUOTE (Liberalwife @ May 14, 2007, 04:11)Cheating is when the harmed person says it is, not when you think it is...!
Ah yes...good point, LW!!...it is when two people have different definitions of something, that bring about real problems!
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| May 14, 2007, 17:37 |
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