|
| AUTHOR |
MESSAGE |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Feuding...
Are you one to hold a grudge? When you disagree with someone, does it automatically cause you to have negative feeling towards that person?
When you're extremely angry with someone, do you need some time to just cool off>
|
| December 8, 2006, 08:22 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I am never one to hold a grudge towards anyone or have negative feeling towards that individual(s)..it's not in my nature...don't know why  ..that's the type of person I am..I guess you catch more bees with honey.don't get me wrong..I do get angry but just let it roll off my shoulders and move on..Life is to short..enjoy ever moment you can.
|
| December 8, 2006, 08:53 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I rarely get angry unless the argument starts to affect my ego or wallet.
|
| December 8, 2006, 08:59 |
|
Tungmeister
69 / male
Miller Beach, Indiana, US
|
Re: Feuding...
When I was younger I would be up in someone's face reacting in a heartbeat and could hold a grudge for a long time. It took me a while but over the years I've come to realize that it's not worth the time, effort or the negative effects that mindset can have on the psyche or the body. Not worth an ulcer or losing sleep over. Now it usually amounts to a "piss off" and I move on to something or someone more worthy of my time & efforts.
|
| December 8, 2006, 09:13 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I'm more of a "Let's stick to the issue or problem and get it worked out and just leave the personal crap out of it" type...I'm never really angry at or with the person I argue with, I just wanna get to the bottom of it all, work on the compromise or solution and move on.
|
| December 8, 2006, 09:17 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
i pretty much never am angry.. even when i should be. guess i've taken the "water off a ducks back" thing to an almost unhealthy extreme. But if you do manage to piss with a loved one (thats what it does take) i dont cool off quickly at all and I never forget it.
as far as just general disagreements go i nearly thrive on them... i see arguing as a playful pastime. good natured anyhow... problem is most the world isnt like this and see it as true piss off-ed-ness and take it to heart.
|
| December 8, 2006, 09:44 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I haven't talked to my brother since September 3rd.. because of his girlfriend. Long story but I did talk to my other brother a few days ago and asked him about it... he said ******'* waiting for me to call him first. We're the two youngest and both EXTREMELY hard headed 
Other than that, I'm happy go lucky pretty much all the time and never hold a grudge  lol
|
| December 8, 2006, 09:54 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I hope you and your brother are now talking again, Moon?
BCB, I smiled the entire time I read your post, I so remember way back, when this site was new, small and things were different and we would passionately argue and fight in the forums but at the same time, we'd also be giggling and exchanging personal messages to each other.
I always valued that about you, BCB..that we could go head to head, toe to toe...and it never once became personal or ugly!
|
| December 8, 2006, 10:20 |
|
funlovingpair
59 / couple
Frozen Tundra, Minnesota, US
|
Re: Feuding...
It would have to depend on what being argued. If someone is attacking me, or the family, personally, I will hold a grudge for a very long time, and will never give you a good look again. But if it has to do more with situational stuff, give me second or two and its over. If I don't give ya crap, I don't like you, but if your getting it, your on my good side. 
|
| December 8, 2006, 10:50 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Re: Feuding...
QUOTE (Chazzy @ December 8, 2006, 10:20)I hope you and your brother are now talking again, Moon?
BCB, I smiled the entire time I read your post, I so remember way back, when this site was new, small and things were different and we would passionately argue and fight in the forums but at the same time, we'd also be giggling and exchanging personal messages to each other.
I always valued that about you, BCB..that we could go head to head, toe to toe...and it never once became personal or ugly!
you still havent caught me... and i was even in your neighborhood this summer.
|
| December 8, 2006, 11:11 |
|
hotfarmboy
36 / male
devon, England, UK
|
Re: Feuding...
Dont hold grudges, twould be a large list if i did lol. When i was younger people always used to be horrible when they met me for some reason... Kinda got over the grudge way of dealing with things pretty quickly
|
| December 8, 2006, 15:57 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
Most of the time we just blow it off...lifes too short to be pissed off all the time, and a lot of people aren't even worth wasting your breath on.
M Lev... 
|
| December 8, 2006, 18:44 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I normally dont hold grudges, but I am one that has to cool off a little bit before I can sit down and talk about things to get them worked out. Then comes the making up part if it is with your spouse, and let me tell you, sometimes I will act very mad just to get to the make up part of the whole thing. LMAO.....
|
| December 8, 2006, 21:32 |
|
NRG4U
63 / male
Beaver City, Nebraska, US
|
Re: Feuding...
If someone pisses me off, I tell them how I feel in detail, but 10 minutes later, it's over, i don't hold a grudge. But if they choose to come back,or bring it back up, then the gloves come off, & I won't forget it.
|
| December 8, 2006, 21:59 |
|
PleasantNight
50 / female
Boston, Massachusetts, US
|
Re: Feuding...
I usually prefer to go for quick petty revenge than to hold a grudge for weeks or even years. Grudges take energy, quick stupid acts of childish revenge just require apologies and sometimes repairs. Much easier.
|
| December 11, 2006, 10:18 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Re: Feuding...
QUOTE (PleasantNight @ December 11, 2006, 10:18)I usually prefer to go for quick petty revenge than to hold a grudge for weeks or even years. Grudges take energy, quick stupid acts of childish revenge just require apologies and sometimes repairs. Much easier.
hmmm..good strategy..i like that one...sometimes ya just gotta do what ya gotta do!!
i don't get mad very often, but am usually passionate when i do...but i have learned...the hard way...that ya must think it through...and if you can back off and don't let emotions carry the argument for you...
i am very good at trying to understand the other person's point of view..that goes along way in resolvinig any issues..especially if you realize its not a "my way or else proposition" that seldoms gets anything accomplished...and will come back to bite ya in the ass later...
|
| December 11, 2006, 10:23 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I truly hate finding out that I unintentionally offended someone, or angered someone, and they never took the time to just TELL ME!
Instead, they just decid to carry a grudge...and leave me with no idea why they feel that way...
|
| December 11, 2006, 10:27 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Re: Feuding...
QUOTE (Chazzy @ December 11, 2006, 10:27)I truly hate finding out that I unintentionally offended someone, or angered someone, and they never took the time to just TELL ME!
Instead, they just decid to carry a grudge...and leave me with no idea why they feel that way...
yeah the subtle grudge...like not liking you for something you said...which may have been an incidental comment..i try to be as forgiviing as possible and give people the benefit of the doubt..everyone says something inappropriate or stupid at times.
|
| December 11, 2006, 11:57 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Re: Re: Feuding...
QUOTE (TropiFun @ December 11, 2006, 11:57) QUOTE (Chazzy @ December 11, 2006, 10:27)I truly hate finding out that I unintentionally offended someone, or angered someone, and they never took the time to just TELL ME!
Instead, they just decid to carry a grudge...and leave me with no idea why they feel that way...
yeah the subtle grudge...like not liking you for something you said...which may have been an incidental comment..i try to be as forgiviing as possible and give people the benefit of the doubt..everyone says something inappropriate or stupid at times.
Exactly! There are the subtle but ever present little "jabs" ....and when ya ask 'em straight out..."Do we have a problem?" or "Is everything ok, anything we need to talk about?".....
...they just pipe right up with a "No, everything's just fine!"
|
| December 11, 2006, 12:00 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Re: Re: Re: Feuding...
QUOTE (Chazzy @ December 11, 2006, 12:00) QUOTE (TropiFun @ December 11, 2006, 11:57) QUOTE (Chazzy @ December 11, 2006, 10:27)I truly hate finding out that I unintentionally offended someone, or angered someone, and they never took the time to just TELL ME!
Instead, they just decid to carry a grudge...and leave me with no idea why they feel that way...
yeah the subtle grudge...like not liking you for something you said...which may have been an incidental comment..i try to be as forgiviing as possible and give people the benefit of the doubt..everyone says something inappropriate or stupid at times.
Exactly! There are the subtle but ever present little "jabs" ....and when ya ask 'em straight out..."Do we have a problem?" or "Is everything ok, anything we need to talk about?".....
...they just pipe right up with a "No, everything's just fine!"
seldom if ever is "everything fine" when you ask it...its just a bs response or avoiding confrontation or frightened to be honest...it sucks but its reality..
"everything is fine" is the "kiss of death phrase"
|
| December 11, 2006, 12:48 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
Yep, you're right...I'll make the sincere effort, and ask once or twice if everything is alright....and if all I get is the BS response...I'll just move on...figure it's their problem, not mine!
|
| December 11, 2006, 12:54 |
|
pepper
56 / female
daytona, Florida, US
|
Re: Feuding...
I'm not much or a hold a grudge type of person. It takes a lot to piss me off when it's just me someone is messing with, but family is something else again, I can hold the anger for a long time, lol, but it's not something active, if you get my meaning, just something that (for instance) if I come across the witch again who hurt my brother, she'll be lucky if she has any hair left, lol!
  
|
| December 12, 2006, 06:34 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I don't like any sort of feuding but I do know if you have them, it makes any sort of relationship stronger. Used to think that it'd take a lot to piss me off but I'm finding out different nowadays. I'm one who takes thing to the heart and I shouldn't on every occasion. I'm trying though, I'm trying.
|
| December 12, 2006, 06:57 |
|
User no longer registered.
|
Re: Feuding...
I don't hold grudges. Waste of time. I know that if the person is doing this to me, they are doing it to others. This increases the opportunity for someone else to fix this person. There is always someone to fix people that harass or whatever for no reason. Not that there is anyway.
|
| December 12, 2006, 08:24 |
|
|
