In An Elevator


1) Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

2) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

3) On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

4) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

5) Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upsidedown.

6) Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

7) Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

8) On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

9) Do Tai Chi exercises.

10) Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"