Pidz
60 / male Always-Under-Dressed, England, UK
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A shaggy dog story...
It was the year 837. The glorious and mighty Viking warriors had landed upon the shores of England and after a continuous 6 month raid of thieving, pillage, rape and battle, they were relieved to hear their replacements were arriving so they can return to their homes and be with their families again for some well earned rest. ‘Hagar the Horrible’, renown as a savage captain of a longship and his officer crew ‘Thomas the Terrible’, who was famous for being the main leader when the crew plundered their violent and bloody attacks on the English villages. There was also ‘Rudolph the Red’, famed for his brutality and fiery, long red hair and beard. He was the longships weather, tide and time navigator. They finally landed in their hometown harbour and each man gathered his recently ill-gotten bounty of money, jewels and riches to bestow on their families and went their separate ways. Hagar suddenly turned around and saw that Rudolph had not moved. So he returned to his friend and asked why he was not making his journey homeward. Rudolph explained that he had no family and that they had been wiped out by a barbaric Norse clan some five years ago. Saddened by his friends loss, Hagar told him to come and meet his family and feel at home with them. And there it was. They spent the next two weeks drinking ale, scoffing pork and enjoying home life. Even Hagar’s wife commented on how good Rudolph was playing with the kids. But the two weeks soon past and our heroes had to return to their battle duties. Rudolph said goodbye to the children and thanked Hagar’s wife for her hospitality. He left Hagar to say goodbye to his wife with a long farewell kiss and on doing so noticed the washing line was full of sheets and clothing. He turned and called back to Hagar’s wife, “You had better get that lot in, I feel change is coming”! His wife looked around and saw brilliant sunshine, with not a cloud in the sky. She said to Hagar, “But how can he tell the weather will soon change so fast?” Hagar replied, “You’d better listen to him, because”...
Wait for it...
“'Rudolph the Red' knows rain dear”......
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