I love the Gieco commercial..."do people use smartphones to do dumb things?"

Seriously, one thing I do not like hear someone say "Wanna see my new app?"

In my head I'm saying "Oh gawd no, no, no, no I don't wanna see another silly new app" but I always end up saying outloud "Sure"..."Well, oh wow, isn't that just the coolest"

I think I figured out why they call them, "Smart" phones... A buddy of mine got one. It had so many apps. He was always finding new ones and telling me about them. He told me to the point that I no longer cared for his discoveries. One day, we were driving in separate vehicles, when he found an app for finding faster routes and had to tell me about it. Now, I have a pet-peeve about talking on cellphones while driving, but he was so overjoyed about his new app discovery, that he called me to exclaim. I put mine on speaker phone. "Hey, my new app will find us an alternate route back, follow me!!!"

He took off like a bat out of hell. "My new app says to take the next right!" Without even looking up, he turned right and booted it. Trouble was, it was a one way road and he was going the wrong way down it. It wasn't until the oncoming traffic alerted him to that fact by laying on their horns. "Oh shit, this is going to hurt!" I heard booming through my speaker. He jerked left for a second, before he swung right, launching his car into the nearby wooded area...

It probably wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for the stump at the edge of the forest. His car hit it on the right side and it flipped to the left, sliding forward like a hot knife through butter, under the thick pine needles that had been there for years...undisturbed. I watched as his car slid into the woods, the brake lights glowing hot enough to blow out the rear tail lights. He had both feet uselessly planted on the brake pedal and his whole body was rigor-mortise, except for his mouth that was screaming out loud. It was so loud, that I could hear him without the aid of my phone on speaker.

I drove around, taking the correct street and coming back around. He was now swearing up a storm, but it seemed faint on my phone. I pulled up to the spot, just short of the cars that had pulled over to offer their assistance. The car was now on its roof and he was out of it, kicking the door and swearing. "Stupid fucking phone, stupid fucking car!" he yelled, before pitching the phone head-long into the woods. When everything had calmed down, and we got the car uprighted and towed out of the woods, I went to take a look for the phone in the direction it was thrown. I found it not far from the scene. He threw it right straight at a tree! The screen was broke and the liquid crystal had bled to the point you couldn't read it anymore. I remember laughing out loud after finding it. "I broke it on a tree, that's just fucking great!" he bitched. "Well, that was SMART...phone!" I laughed some more.

He's since replaced the phone, but he stays a bit more on the quieter side, but every now and then he can't help but go off on a tangent about how good his new phone works. Only now, I make it a point to mention this story to his embarrassment...

I would discourage anyone using the GPS or app in my area, visiting family tried that against my warnings, took them an extra hour and half to get to our house.

GPS may find the shortest route, but not always a 55 - 60 mile an hour route, they ended up on dirt lanes puttering through at 15 - 25 mph, had to make the decision to turn around and find another route or ford the creek, and even manever across a few scarey looking bridges.

  QUOTE (Chazzy @ July 2, 2011, 18:01)
when AmberZed comes to visit, she uses her phones GPS, it's good sometimes, but when you live in a state with Road Construction listed as the fifth season, and the roads are constantly being detoured, sometimes the GPS doesn't always have the current correct route, or the alternate routes given end up taking longer than if you had stuck it out in the one lane traffic jam.

I would discourage anyone using the GPS or app in my area, visiting family tried that against my warnings, took them an extra hour and half to get to our house.

GPS may find the shortest route, but not always a 55 - 60 mile an hour route, they ended up on dirt lanes puttering through at 15 - 25 mph, had to make the decision to turn around and find another route or ford the creek, and even manever across a few scarey looking bridges.

Great story GG! I love and depend on my Smart Phone way to much. But always love when it fucks up and I want to throw it in the nearest body of water.

We were looking at colleges for with my daughter. I told Kam no need for maps , both me and my daughter had our phones and they will navigate us to the exact address of where we have to go. We just type in the name of the place and the phone will talk us right to the door. (By the way a word of caution. If you have a mailing address and not the physical address this will fuck you up!I have been sent to more than one post office.)

So just to make me look stupid I put in the address in my Android and it wants us to go someplace miles from our intended destination. So my daughter tries her iPhone and same problem. It turns out that because two schools named the place we wanted the same thing the phone decided to send us to the one it liked. When it gets listed in a phone book or GPS a certain way it will send you to the one it thinks you want.It will sometimes give you options but they aren't options that normally help me if I don't know a place well. So these phones aren't so smart after all. It didn't want to send me to the closest one no matter how I tried to get it to do so. Kam just keeps laughing at me when I tell him how much I love my phone and how it helps me find places.Every time I tried using it around him it hasn't worked! At this rate lake Michigan might get a Pretty Android deposited in in its water to see if it floats.