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twizztedick
47 / couple
deridder, Louisiana, US
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how to say good bye
how do you tell some one that you love and have love most of your life good bye?. when you know they are not happy any more and want to leave, but just waiting on you to tell them its ok . . . but you don't want it to be over even though you know it is. is it selfish? or just dumb?
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| April 7, 2011, 03:31 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: how to say good bye
It's one of the hardest things to do. But if you truly love or loved someone, and know in your heart that the person doesn't want to be with you anymore or that you don't want to be with that person you have to just do it.Do you really want someone to be with you if you know they don't want to be. Is it fair to stay with someone that you don't want to be with. Either way it's just something that you have to do. It's so hard but after you do it and go through the initial "Did I just do the dumbest thing of my life" moment I think you know you will feel better. It takes time and sometimes a lot of time but it's like lifting a weight off your shoulders when you know in your heart it's been over for a long time even though you were together.
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| April 7, 2011, 04:11 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: how to say good bye
I usually let my divorce lawyer handle that.
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| April 7, 2011, 04:18 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: how to say good bye
QUOTE (twizztedick @ April 7, 2011, 03:31)how do you tell some one that you love and have love most of your life good bye?. when you know they are not happy any more and want to leave, but just waiting on you to tell them its ok . . . but you don't want it to be over even though you know it is. is it selfish? or just dumb?
Ahhhh, I'm sad too if you're talking about you.
What's up? Write me a note dear.
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| April 7, 2011, 11:26 |
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ashkats
65 / couple
crystal falls, Michigan, US
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Re: how to say good bye
i had a bad one once , i ended up not even a name , just hey you,... and like the song says 50 ways to leave your lover.... 
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| April 8, 2011, 18:24 |
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twizztedick
47 / couple
deridder, Louisiana, US
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Re: how to say good bye
thanks to all of you that commented.i was a mean evil person for along time and have changed for the better in the last year and a half and i am alot happier person now think this will be the last time i will be on for awhile going to ask tonight for her to leave
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| April 10, 2011, 05:24 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: how to say good bye
I sure wish ya'all the best, luv ya both.
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| April 10, 2011, 13:58 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: how to say good bye
My first marriage was not on the rocks, there were some rough waters, but no fighting...I sure didn't think it was dead, we just needed a good heart to heart to clean up the mess lack of communication leaves behind, unresolved issues.
I was told via the telephone, not even to my face it was done. I had called her to ask how her day was going at work, and she dropped that bomb on me. I didn't fight it, didn't get into the why's and so on...she had made her decision, and had met a Knight in shining armor, so she thought. She and I still lived in our house for a time...we didn't hate each other at all, though her method of telling me was cowardly. I even told her, hey this was her house too, if her and this guy wanted the place on the weekend when I was playing in the band, I'd just stay at the guitar players house, my best friend. If she didn't want me, she didn't want me...anger would not change that. What she didn't know was more often than not I was sleeping in the woods, in my car...I never told her. But shortly thereafter she found Sir Knight wasn't quite as shiny as she thought he was...just the opposite, took her for money supposedly borrowed..long story. But she then comes to me, crying saying she was wrong, I had always treated her with respect and was good to her..she'd made a huge mistake. I as I say didn't hate her but simply asked "If this guy, this knight was all you thought he was...would you be here right this minute..telling me this? No...you'd be with him...isn't that true? She couldn't answer as she knew there wasn't one....that was the end of eleven years...It turned out that he had taken her for so much that she, very much out of character, embezzled the money from the store she was managing, with full intent on putting it back and I believe she would have. She got caught...he was gone, she was going to be going to be finger printed, Mug shots, then court an so on, and as I say what she'd done was not her at all....thus she was scared shitless. So....I went with her to each "frightening" thing she had to do, so she didn't have to face it alone. It was still over.....friends said I was nuts and yada yada...I said whatever..After she got probation and restitution she moved, this being a fairly small town and all. And that was that...
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| April 10, 2011, 20:18 |
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twizztedick
47 / couple
deridder, Louisiana, US
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Re: how to say good bye
there is no hate from me in this just after 17+ years together i think i should get more than i don't know or i havn't thought about it ...... i want to know why i'm such a good guy but you can't tell me why your leaving ? just sounds like a load of crap to me
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| April 13, 2011, 05:57 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: how to say good bye
You are a good man, I know it helps to have answers, you deserve to know. Most likely, it'll all come to the surface sooner or later and you'll have the answers.
Stay strong there, doode....it is so tough to break up after such a long time together.
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| April 13, 2011, 12:02 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: how to say good bye
Been there done that.......
Don' think there is an easy way for either one involved, someone always gets hurt, whether you want them to or not.
But you need to be strong and think about whats going to be good for you 
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| April 13, 2011, 14:13 |
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Iwant2kssuallovr
62 / female
Bendover, Florida, US
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Re: how to say good bye
My first goodbye, was all very civil. I somehow managed to get him to agree to the divorce. I saw the attorney, papers were written, I drove, he signed, I drove back. About 10 days later we were divorced. I was still at the house, he was still in love with me. I moved away, but would go and visit him, as when we had dated.
The second time was different. I agreed to give him a second chance. His soberity last (or was mild), for about 6 months, then it was full on. Now he was being aggressive. He had physically pushed me, and beat my dog.
I didn't try to talk to him about it.
One day while he was at work, I called the movers. I only took what was mine. He would have had nothing if I took everything I bought. I never talked to him again.
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| April 13, 2011, 15:37 |
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twizztedick
47 / couple
deridder, Louisiana, US
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Re: how to say good bye
no abuse just no talking over the last 6 months are so and i've tried every thing . if it doesn't invole the bills getting paid nothing .... this house is just to dang lonly with me and the cats and the dog . . .got to find something to do after work or to talk to .........and no i don't drink alone , or that much any more
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| April 16, 2011, 03:30 |
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