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Teen Age meets Old Age
Was watching this fascinating documentary last night on TV. A group of 4 teenagers voluntered to work in a community of independant and fully cared for older people.
It was the first show last night and the teenagers worked with the carers, doing everything from feeding, bathing and caring for the totally dependant to visiting those independant pensioners in the community cottages and playing games with them. It was interesting to see how the young peoples views of old people being moaning and judgemental and should just get back on with living were challenged. As well as some of the older people, whose views on single parent families and other areas were challenged by the teenagers.
I guess I have always taken some things for granted being brought up with living grandparents and caring for my parents as well as caring for the children in my family, but if you have no experience with the older or generation, how can you be expected to understand them?
Not sure what discussion can come from this, but was an area that really hit home with me
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| February 22, 2011, 13:54 |
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Iwant2kssuallovr
62 / female
Bendover, Florida, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Josie, it is a very touching and real subject. I think in order to deal with any age, it necessary to have a little compassion, and not be totally into onself.
I just finished a class, and the instructor told a story. He was in a nursing home visiting someone, and during the visit he saw a woman sitting in a wheelchair. He hair was flat on one side where she had been sleeping, but her eyes were bright. He went to her and said, "Hi, it's nice to me you, how are you today?" And she preceeded to tell im a story of her dog Rufus. In the story, the dog ran away. The second time she told the story, he came back. The third time she told the story, it had yet another ending. See she had alzheimers. But, while he spoke to the woman, he noticed she had had a little accident, and he went to the counter to tell the nurse, who was on the phone with her boyfriend for some assistance. She in returned said she would be right there. The third time he went to the counter, he slammed his hand on the desk and said, "She needs attention right now." and he hung up the phone.
"You see," he said. "he looked into her eyes, and once upon a time she was a young girl , she ran and danced. She sang, and had children. She had lovers, who took her in their arms." And, he said, " even though she has alzheimers, I believe she knows when her hair is brushed, even though she has alzheimers, I believe she likes he bathes and a clean frock. Even though she has alzheimers, she must like her nails to be done."
It is so easy to forget, but the young people could not have lived the difficult lives of the now elderly. These people are the backbone of our country.
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| February 22, 2011, 15:38 |
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Just watch the Brett Eldredge video for the song "She Calls Me Raymond"
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| February 22, 2011, 16:06 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
My kids happened to do a lot of volunteer work and also have been fortunate enough to have had several grandparents and great grandparents in their lives. I have seen the good and bad to this as they have. I live in an area that has a primarily senior community and it can be frustrating at times. I have come across seniors that think the fact that they are a senior somehow entitles them to have bad behavior or free everything even though some have more money than I will ever have. The reverse is that I have seen some that have suffered so much and given so much and now can't afford to turn their heat on.
It is like every other part of society. You have to look at the whole picture as well as each person as an individual not based on the way the last senior, kid, white, black, whatever treated you. If someone is a good person they are good no mater the age. Treating someone with respect in general should not have to do with age.(Or title) No one should be disrespected just because they are to disabled to speak up for themselves. I have seen it happen so many times.
We were at a concert that was being put on by a group of professional entertainers that travel around to the needy and do these types of things. We were part of the group that goes through the audience and gives out gifts, cards, or even just talk to the people. This happened to be a nursing home. This very elderly lady was just holding my daughters hand and crying. My daughter was so young at the time but she handled it well. We were told she never gets visitors. She was so grateful to have someone to talk to and get a simple thing like a Christmas card and a small gift but most of all the companionship of a person other than medical personnel that she couldn't stop crying.My daughter still remembers that. The sad part was we asked if we would be able to come visit this women because its in our town. We were told NO. Only family is allowed to visit unless it is a situation like this. It still breaks my heart.
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| February 22, 2011, 21:37 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
My Mother passed away this last August, and as did her mother spent the last part of her life in a nursing home, her health had been a struggle for the last two decades of her life as she had congestive heart failure, a quadruple bi-pass with an artificial valve, a stroke during surgery 20 years prior to her passing. After that she was up and down with several heart attacks, which slowly damaged her heart more and more. She was in the hospital countless times. On so many medications it was unbelievable as she also had diabetes to deal with. Through all of this she was the strongest most inspirational and strong woman you'd have ever met. Still getting out as much as she could. She insisted on living alone till the last few months of her life in which her health called for hospice care which negated the choice for any sibling to stay with her, she needed medical attention nearby at all times. Through the time prior though she endured falling and breaking her ankle, after which called for a long stay in a rehab-nursing home to get her strength back. So stoic she was..and I more than once was the one pounding my fist at the homes, or local hospital due to her not getting the respect of basic care she so deserved. To need her hair combed, a pillow, some of the most basic things yet I saw neglect and though I am a kind hearted person I can get down right ugly in such instances and did. The squeaky wheel gets the grease she once said and I was as squeaky as a wheel gets. She came home from the ankle re-hab only to fall again but no more than a few weeks later and broke her hip. As a family we thought through the countless heart caths and tests, multiple heart attacks...practically drowning do to her congestive heart problems, and NOW the hip would bring her life to an end. She bounced back as quick as anyone could. Through these two decades she had times where she was feeling pretty good considering, and then would falter. Her main primary doctor practically needed to a forklift to mover her records they were so extensive and I tip my hat to him for compassion and knowledge in keeping her going as he did. She never complained, she'd speak of pain now and then but never spoke of bitterness towards her struggle.
This long description is for the purpose that after her death I went through photos of her as a young girl , a woman, a mother, a grandmother...and this woman still beautiful late in life was no less than gorgeous as a young lady. I mean stop one in their tracks beautiful. And as smart as anyone I've ever known. So one that doesn't know these people and only first see's them at the end of such a struggle or in the midst do not see the past. What they brought to the world, how they brought life and enriched lives...we see the person no longer capable of self reliance. To then see anyone be a victim of neglect will make me jump before thought and seeking help for them, while visiting her in the hospital or nursing home I'd see a person I didn't know, sitting needing assistance yet being ignored and would HAVE to say something to the staff, as I'd see in them what I saw in my mother...that I had no clue what THEY brought to the world, how many lives they touched...all elderly people were once young and strong and did amazing things at some point in life. Yet seen with different eyes once older and in need. She prepared for her death in such an no fearful, detailed manner. She had a casket hand made in the garage by the pastor at the church she attended to save the family the cost. Yet it was beautifully made. Her passing was a celebration for the last days were pain filled, her suffering had come to an end.
I was lucky enough to befriend a ex marine that fought in Iwo Jima, there's but a handful left alive. A incredible spirit, a heart way to big to fit within the man...yet he would not be exempt from being seen with such shallow eyes once frail to those that don't stop and think, he was once a powerful brave man, stoic, as my mother was a beautiful woman . So see with the eyes wide open, not the picture before you of the person that thinks not clearly...to reach out to them in any manner no matter the size or amount is no less than what they deserve...they were and are the backbone of all we see and take for granted at times in life.
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| February 28, 2011, 14:05 |
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ashkats
65 / couple
crystal falls, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
i think i been there too 5 hart attacks with the ole man loss of half of his leg mom had to deal with it we were living out of state and then him dieing in the VA hospital on turkey day from complications from diabetes, now i seen to be in the same slot, i have that dammed disease,trying to keep my sugars down cause it smucks up your veins and such when its too high and then i we all quit smoking its been 13 or 14 years now smoke free but i gained weight 80 lbs and I'm still trying to lose it, i been on and off dietetics since i got edema , some day i will be 205 again lol. but my job i use to go into nursin g homes and retirement villages and such and it opens your mind at what ya seen
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| February 28, 2011, 18:44 |
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
I totally agree with all the views here. I do however always play devils advocate and try to see things from all sides
I have done and will always respect everyone's right to their own opinion and we should respect and care for our older generations. Compassion, understanding and respect should come as naturally as breathing does to anyone who cares for, works with or interacts with older people.
However I do understand why the younger generation sometimes sees them as almost an alien race. Some of the commn opinions and thoughts and actions from their era just have no place today. For example, single parent families, mixed race relationships, same sex marriages.
All these things are accepted today and there will always be a gap between the ages which is brought about by circumstance.
I do believe that all groups, no matter what their age should try to understand and respect others. Some individuals will always ruin it for the rest.
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| February 28, 2011, 22:06 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Wouldn't it be nice if people would open their minds and talk. My great grandmother was very open minded and excepting, yet her daughter my grandmother was very closed minded and prejudice. We never could figure that out. I remember some of the fights though. Wow!
My kids are very open minded I hope they pass that long.I know my kids each have friends that are varying races, sexual preferences and religions.But yet I see that in many ways prejudice is growing in society. It's hard to understand.
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| February 28, 2011, 22:18 |
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
It is almost as soon as the world opened up and we started to talk openly about everything we just started to shut down.
I heard a quoate the other day "When fear arrives, intolerance and prejudice follow directly behind". Maybe that is part of it today
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| February 28, 2011, 22:27 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
I agree as well yet just as the older people could be less set in their ways, thus be more open to at least look at things from a different non stubborn angle, it is a two way street as the younger ones need to look at the angle of the elder with the same open mind. To agree to disagree if that's what is needed. What I speak of is that many see older people that need assistance, no matter what that is, and forget that that person was once as vital if not more than they are. Just as they got older, some gracefully some with pain or hardship so to shall we. And just as I respect and fight the neglect older people sometimes endure.....they become a "burden" ...to society and even the immediate family, I will be that squeaky wheel when I am old, needing help or not. Hell I squeak now, and I will then. It's about mutual respect and to see those that need help neglected is somewhat the same as a bully, being the coward singling out the easiest target. Society finds it easier to look the other way in terms of the elderly because they too...are the easy target.
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| March 1, 2011, 04:35 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Kind of a silly comment because of what Grandelf posted and it made me think of it. I was in my home town with my kids a few years back and ran across an old Gymnastic coach of mine. I was a gymnast from a little kid until I got pregnancy with my first child. I never talked to my kids about it that much. They just knew I liked the sport. When the coach and I started reliving my younger days through some stories all my kids kept saying was "Our mom did that stuff? No way!" A few weeks later we were upstate at our old summer house and talking to some friends about how we did pyramids and other water skiing tricks on the lake as well as that we would go horseback riding and play softball every weekend.Again my kids were in disbelief. I know I never expected to be A bit heaver and out of shape and have some major injuries that would keep me from all the sports I was once involved in. I looked at my kids and said "I am your future, that is a scary thought isn't it?" I bet most of us never thought much about our parents and grandparents in their youth.
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| March 1, 2011, 05:27 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
That story is SO me as well...I played most all sports, was good at most, great at none....baseball, a lot of hockey and football, tennis, raced snowmobiles etc...and I was little, ( I wore the same size clothes for like three years in elementary school, my Mom was like yes!!! Money saved!! ) I did eventually sprout to a mountainish 5'8", lol...But at any size I was stupidly fearless, I'd throw myself at any size guy to tackle him or check him etc...And now I pay. My Dad was a great swimmer, could run like the wind..yet as kids we don't see that much so rarely if ever think about it. I have a 15 year old son and I can only tell him stories of playing football on hockey skates..(smart eh?)..I played hockey till about a year before he was born and got hurt..sigh. Far from frail I have to watch it now as the owwies are much more severe if I re-injure...That's all for now from the news desk here live from the Keebler Hollow tree.....Elf.
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| March 1, 2011, 07:01 |
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ashkats
65 / couple
crystal falls, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
just amazing how old injury's come back to haunt you.as i told my son take care of your body and teeth so they don't haunt you in the future.
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| March 1, 2011, 18:29 |
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Maybe we need as the middle generation (there is probably something trendy that we are called, but I have no idea what it is), have the biggest part to play in all this.
Maybe we hold the responsibility to try to bring the other generations together? since we understand each side a little better.
As for injuries all I know is my years of partying and being awake all night and sleeping on friends floors are long behind me and probaby responsible for the fact I am in Physio today. Either that or the fact I refuse to age and keep doing stupid things!
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| March 2, 2011, 21:18 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
I just wonder what being old will feel like...I am a card carrying member of the "Peter Pan, I'm never gonna grow up" club as well as a "Toys are us kids" club...( I have wall plaques too by the way )
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| March 7, 2011, 21:21 |
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
My favourite saying is "You are only as old as the person you are feeling"...oh and by the way I am 37 in April if that is an age anyone fancies feeling
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| March 7, 2011, 21:24 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Ah but 37 is a wonderful magical age...It seems like only yester.... ahem, 14 years ago! I am still just an elf...all those years later.
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| March 7, 2011, 21:37 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
I will be 49 later this month if you want to feel that out for a while.....I might know someone who might even want to supervise the whole thing, just to make sure we're doing it right of course.
By the way, have you noticed that the vision of an Elf has changed a bit since Keebler? I like the more modern version a lot more!
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| March 7, 2011, 21:51 |
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Grandelf
64 / male
Northern, Michigan, US
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
Well I tried in vain to get Earnie Keebler and the rest to come here and meet you, but alas they are set in their elvish ways....So, more fun for this young elf! Woo hoo!
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| March 7, 2011, 22:20 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: Teen Age meets Old Age
I would very much want to try out how I would feel both your ages..and anything else you are offering lol
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| March 7, 2011, 22:28 |
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