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Dysfunctional or functional?
Do you feel you grew up in a functional or dysfunctional home?
What is "dysfunctional" anyway? Is being completely spoiled and shelterd functional because there was no abuse or turmoil in the home, can sheltered also be dysfunctional? If you still learn allot of the right things by the bad example, then was it really dysfunctional?
I think my home was dysfuntional, but hey, raising kids is not an exact science, no step 1, step 2 kinda rules to follow really and I'm certain that some of my better quallties come from the mistakes my parents made, as well as the right things they did.
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| May 9, 2008, 13:08 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
Chazzy, that's like saying what is normal vs. normal. What's dysfunctional to one, might not be dysfunctional to someone else, there is a wide spectrum on what is dysfunctionalism which is a very open question, where it can be perceived in so many ways, since we come from all walks of life, and our life experiences. Just my opinion, excuse me.
tica... 
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| May 9, 2008, 20:23 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
Well, saying normal vs normal would be like saying functional vs functional.....and opinions is what this is all about.
I'm more or less asking about abnormal vs normal here, what do you consider to be abnormal, or normal.
So like...a home where the parents get stinkin' drunk and beat their kids, pretty safe to say that would be abnormal and dysfunctional. A normal person can come from this type of home, and it's also possible that it could turn a child into a sociopath, a rage maniac and someone who will beat their own children.
A child can be raised in a home so loving, that the child is spoiled and totally sheltered so much that they become a dysfunctional adult and have inablilities to take care of themselves and have severe issues functioning "normally" in a relationship or work place.
..in ya'alls opinon...would you consider this a dysfunctional home?
It's just a discussion....
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| May 9, 2008, 21:03 |
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funlovingpair
59 / couple
Frozen Tundra, Minnesota, US
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
I feel that I came from a functional home. It was no Ozzy and Harriet, we had our share of problems. But compared to some families, I'd take what I grew up in, any day. Oh by the way, my parents have celebrated their 50th anniversary.
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| May 9, 2008, 21:21 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
Ah cool, my parents too, are still together, devoted and loving, and have passed their 50 year anniversary!
Mine I would describe as dysfunctional, not because they were drunk asses, mean, or anything like that, they were good people but it was mostly due to my mother trying to raise children during the period of time when severe depression and post partum depression were not taken seriously. The remedies for these "fragile nervous women" were just uping the dose of valium. That was "normal" for that era, but still dysfunctional by todays standards I guess.
How much of our own qualities, characteristics, or dare say...our personal flaws are due to parenting mistakes, what was considered normal for that time period...and I think those from multi-children households, the same parents that raised a first born have grown and learned, or maybe just tired by then, are so different when they raise the latter born children.
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| May 9, 2008, 21:38 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
QUOTE (Chazzy @ May 9, 2008, 13:08)Do you feel you grew up in a functional or dysfunctional home?
What is "dysfunctional" anyway? Is being completely spoiled and sheltered functional because there was no abuse or turmoil in the home, can sheltered also be dysfunctional? If you still learn allot of the right things by the bad example, then was it really dysfunctional?
I think my home was dysfunctional, but hey, raising kids is not an exact science, no step 1, step 2 kinda rules to follow really and I'm certain that some of my better qualities come from the mistakes my parents made, as well as the right things they did.
As a graduating member of the Norris household, I made it through 20 years of having my mom pretty much raise the 5 siblings with my father being off to work by traveling all over the place. I think this situation was considered completely functional and normal. I do not concur. It sucked. I hardly knew my father and when I had the chance to spend time with him, we didn't get along. To be honest, the man has been dead for 26 years and I don't miss him at all. That my friends is dysfunctional!!
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| May 9, 2008, 21:59 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
My home while growing up wasn't dysfunctional. It just didn't work that well sometimes. 
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| May 9, 2008, 22:36 |
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Re: Dysfunctional or functional?
Definitely dysfunctional. Started with my grandparents, parents, then carried on by me with my children and low and behold they are now doing the same thing! Teaching respect for the rights of others, strong work ethics, compassion, educational obligations and on and on. Where did we go wrong? Who do we think we are? Raising kids to be self sufficient, caring members of society. No doubt about it I'm guilty of being a dysfunctional parent.
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| May 10, 2008, 06:27 |
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